In this first installment of decluttering tips (when you've got some body image issues), we're covering: making a huge pile, categorizing, and dealing with pants.
Make a huge pile of every item of clothing you have!
To really understand just how much you truly have, we put it all in one large, mountain-like pile. Almost always, I get asked: "But do I really have to?"
Yes. So. Much. Yes.
The first few reasons are obvious:
- the "wow factor"
- the idea that decluttering can happen in truth, as there's no clothing hiding anywhere else
B U T, for those of us with body issues, this is a tangible, visual representation of our mental struggle. All of our successes and failures, wrapped up in shirts and pants, are laying bare, on the floor, staring us in the face.
It can be humiliating.
It can be haunting.
It can be reminiscent of a size we once were, whether we enjoyed the size, or not.
Decluttering clothes, when you're feeling this pain, can seem unbearable. But no mountain ever climbed was one easy ascent to the summit. It comes with jagged rocks, unstable steps, and unfathomable exhaustion. And sometimes, there's a place to breathe.
Decluttering the clothing-- getting rid of every piece that doesn't serve you, that doesn't lift you up to that summit-- will provide you the peace you need on this climb.
So yes, we make the pile. And we take out everything that weights you down. Because seeing the pile is a reminder of the weight you're carrying. Not the weight on the scale, but the weight in your heart, mind, and soul.
Categorize: Pants, Shirts, Dresses, etc.
You've made the mountain of clothes. One big step in this journey has been decided: you have chosen to climb. But how?
We divide and conquer. We make smaller, more manageable piles. And we start with whichever pile you feel is easiest.
Let's think of your jeans pile for a hot second. Maybe you only have a few pairs. But me? I had tons. And in all different sizes. I knew I could see a huge impact by removing every pair that no longer fit me.
Was it a struggle? Yes. (More on that next)
Was it the huge impact I expected? Not at all.
Yes, my pile was incredibly reduced. Yes, I knew storing them would be easier. But the impact I hadn't expected was the profound amount of weight that came off my chest when I let them go. Small pile by small pile, I lost weight. Not the kind that resides on my hips and thighs, but the kind that suppressed my confidence and worth.
Conquer and divide, mama. You've got this.
Repeat after me: We do not keep the pants.
My pile of jeans, many moons ago, was around 15 pairs. Three different sizes, five pairs in each size. It felt like a wall of jeans at a trendy store.
I took a deep breath and did it. I decided that the 10 pairs in two sizes too small had to leave. It pained me to see them go... the money spent, the weight gained, the guilt rising. I felt so deflated (yet bloated?).
And then it happened. This miracle moment. This profound suspension in time, when I realized that pairs of jeans-- floppy, inanimate objects-- had a persuasion over my feelings that I could not control.
And I, admittedly, am a control freak.
The idea that clothing could leave me feeling horribly... I detested it. And then I got angry. I took those 10 pairs of jeans and donated them that day. You, jeans, would never control me ever again.
I may not be able to control my feelings on my body all the time, but I can sure as hell control the way my closet makes me feel. And starting with just one small pile can make all the difference.
You deserve pants that make you feel amazing, mama.
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